It is always an adventure when I do an activity with my bestie Robin and a trip to the Dior exhibit at the Denver Art Museum (DAM) is no exception.
I feverishly started making a plan. Since Robin was driving, I agreed to pay for parking and pick up her cocktail tab (since she was the driver, the tab would be small ... I am always thinking).
I guided Robin to the outdoor parking lot across from the DAM. Who knew there were cash only machines around??? I mean don't we live by plastic nowadays. Lesson learned - bring a wad of dollar bills as if you are going to a strip joint. It seriously took us 5 minutes to read the sign and figure out what we had to do, but unfortunately we did not read the fine print. Both of us had $20 bills so Robin inserted her $20 and BAM - she got $13 in quarters back as change. Think of winning at a slot machine in Atlantic City and that is exactly what happen except we did not have a plastic cup for the overflow. Well I thought it was hilarious and was excellent material for my blog so I made Robin pose for several pictures. By the time we finished the photo shoot and Robin found safe lodging for her quarters, the gate arm came back down and we could not get in the lot!! The machine did not take quarters which is pretty ironic. Since we did not want another 52 quarters and I did not think it was wise for Robin to ram the gate (she was inching up to do it), we backed out to park somewhere else.
We finally made it into the museum. Robin wanted to store her coat. The usher told her the locker only takes quarters ... we had that covered.
After the exhibit, we drove to the parking garage at the Brown Palace for high tea because we are fancy like that. I knew the restaurant was booked, but felt confidant we could wrangle a table. I told Robin to stay behind me as I sashayed to the host. I nonchalantly said to him that we will have a table for two. He looked at me as if I was mad, but how could he possibly know I was certifiably crazy? The host told me they have been booked for weeks. With my best flirty voice, I asked the host if he would be willing to play Santa Claus .... he found us a table and I am pretty sure he was afraid of me. I did tell him if he needed the table, to just walk by and wink at me. Now that I think about it, he was really more like an elf in stature.
After we gorged ourselves on scones, finger sandwiches, pastries and washed it down with champagne, we walked up 16th street mall to burn off some of the scones and pastries. The tea sandwiches were so small you actually burned calories eating them. At this point all I wanted was to find Sephora to buy false eyelashes and a lesson on how to apply them. I told Robin to dig out her phone and to get us there. That was a HUGE mistake because Robin is obviously map challenged and was looking at the map upside down. She guided us to the end of the mall to oblivion and now I would have no falsies and I was in desperate need of a refreshment. So we hopped on the trolley to an establishment that serves adult beverages.
We sat next to a young couple - you know the set up - a coffee table with a couch and chairs to resemble your home. We ordered a cocktail and then I order another one. It was time to go so I took out my wallet to buy the drinks. The nice couple left and we nodded with our best Happy Holiday nod. When the bill came, I could not find my wallet. I started yelling that the couple stole my wallet. Robin jumped up and told me to stand up and I asked her why since it was obvious and I positively knew that the couple stole my wallet. When I stood up, there was my wallet on my chair right where that nice couple put it.
It was time to end the day of festivities so we went to the parking garage except we could not figure out how to get in the garage. So we waited for a car to pull in and we ran behind the car. Seriously you cannot make this shit up. After dodging incoming and outgoing cars, we found Robin's car. Now here is where I was pretty darn smart. I reserved and paid for our spot online. As we got to the exit where there is garage door closed and a gate arm down, we followed the directions on the sheet and called the attendant. Robin followed her directions and inserted the parking ticket. The attendant then asked for the ticket number which we had fed into the machine. The attendant hung up on us. Now we are stuck at the exit with a line of cars behind us. Robin is kind of freaking out yelling at the machine in her Southern accent (I think she blessed it's heart which is not a good thing) ... I did not have the heart to tell her no one could hear her except the line of cars behind us who surely thought she was recently let out of a mental institution. I called security and the man said he would be there in about 10 minutes.
In the meanwhile, a very nice woman came to help us by hitting some buttons to get the garage door open, but she was unable to get the gate up. We explained the problem to her and thanked her profusely for her assistance and let her know security would be here shortly to help her. The security guard arrived just like Santa ... I have no idea how he got in the garage so he must have slid down the chimney. We told him the attendant came to help us and he asked what we were talking about. We told him again the attendant came and told her to wait for security to help her. He told us that was the lady in the car behind us. Nonetheless he rescued us from a long night in the parking garage and home we went.
The Dior exhibit was spectacular as was the adventure.